Confession: I’m a Fashion Hypocrite
Okay, so I’m gonna start with a confession. I’m that person. The one who judges others for wearing socks with sandals, but then turns around and commits fashion sins that make you wanna gouge your eyes out. I mean, I know better. I’ve been in this industry for over two decades, for crying out loud. But here we are.
It was last Tuesday, actually. I was at this little café on 7th, meeting with a friend named Marcus—let’s call him Marcus because his real name is embarrassing and he’d kill me if I used it. We were catching up, you know, the usual. And then he looked at me, mid-sentence, and said, “Liz, what the hell are you wearing?”
I looked down. I was wearing these completely mismatched socks. One was black, the other was this god-awful neon green. And they were peeking out of my Birkenstocks. Which, by the way, are not a fashion statement. They’re a cry for help.
Marcus just stared at me. “You’re a fashion editor,” he said. “You write about this stuff. And you’re out here committing crimes against fashion.”
Which… yeah. Fair enough.
But Here’s the Thing
I think we’ve all been there. You’re in a rush, you’re not thinking, and suddenly you’re out in public looking like a hot mess. And it’s not just me. It’s everyone. I’ve seen completley put-together people wearing the most ridiculous outfits. Like, how does this happen?
I asked around. I talked to friends, colleagues, even some of the models I work with. And you know what? They all have stories. Like Dave, this colleague of mine, he told me about this time he wore two different shoes to a meeting. Two different shoes! And nobody said anything. Nobody. It was like some silent pact we all have to just pretend we didn’t notice.
But here’s the thing that bothers me the most. It’s not the obvious stuff, like socks with sandals or mismatched shoes. It’s the subtle stuff. The things that make you go, “Hmm, that’s not quite right.” Like, why do people think it’s okay to wear a belt with jeans that have belt loops? Or why do they think it’s a good idea to tuck their shirt in and wear a belt and have the shirt untucked at the same time? It’s like they’re trying to send mixed signals.
And Don’t Even Get Me Started on Accessories
Accessories are a whole other ball game. I swear, people think that just because it’s small, it’s not noticeable. Wrong. So wrong. I was at this conference in Austin a few months back, and I saw a guy wearing a tie that was literally too short for his shirt. The tie was just hanging there, like it was begging for mercy. And the guy? He was committmented to it. Like, “Yeah, this is my tie, and I’m gonna wear it like this, and there’s nothing you can do about it.”
I wanted to say something. I mean, I should have said something. But I didn’t. I just stood there, sipping my coffee, judging him silently. Because that’s what we do, right? We judge. We judge, and we move on.
But here’s the thing: we shouldn’t. We should say something. We should help each other. Because fashion is hard. It’s subjective, it’s personal, and it’s determing what’s right and what’s wrong can be tough. But that doesn’t mean we should just give up and wear whatever we want. There’s a line, people. A line.
So, What’s the Solution?
I’m not sure. I mean, I have my opinions, but honestly, who am I to tell anyone what to wear? I’m the girl who wore mismatched socks to a café, for crying out loud. But I do have some thoughts. Some strong thoughts.
First of all, if you’re gonna wear a belt, make sure it matches your shoes. I know, it’s a lot to ask. But it’s basic. It’s Fashion 101. If you’re gonna tuck in your shirt, make sure it’s all the way in. Don’t half-ass it. And for the love of all that is holy, if you’re gonna wear socks with sandals, make sure they’re at least the same color.
And if you’re really unsure, look at a product reviews recommendation guide. Seriously. It’s not just for kitchen gadgets, you know. There are people out there who review fashion items too. And they can be a lifesaver. I mean, I know it’s not the same as having a personal stylist, but it’s a start. It’s better than nothing.
But here’s the thing: fashion is personal. It’s about expressing yourself. It’s about feeling good in what you wear. And if that means wearing mismatched socks, then so be it. Just own it. Be comfident. Be you.
A Tangent: The Time I Wore a Tutu to a Meeting
Speaking of owning it, let me tell you about this one time. It was about three months ago, and I was having a really bad day. Like, the kind of day where everything goes wrong. My coffee machine broke, my car wouldn’t start, and I spilled my breakfast all over my shirt. So, I did what any rational adult would do: I went to my closet, found this tutu I had from some costume party, and wore it to a meeting.
I know, I know. It was not a good idea. But it made me feel better. It made me laugh. And honestly, it made everyone else laugh too. It turned a bad day into a really good story. So, maybe that’s the key. Maybe fashion isn’t about the rules. Maybe it’s about making you feel good. Maybe it’s about having fun.
But still. No socks with sandals. Come on.
Anyway, that’s my rant. My confession. My apologia. I’m not perfect. I make mistakes. But I’m trying. I’m trying to be better. To learn. To grow. And to maybe, just maybe, stop wearing mismatched socks.
Author Bio: Liz Carter has been a senior editor at various fashion magazines for over 20 years. She’s seen it all, done it all, and regrets about 73% of her fashion choices. When she’s not writing, she’s probably judging your outfit. Or at least thinking about it. You can find her on Instagram @lizcarterfashion, where she posts pictures of her dog and occasional fashion advice. (Mostly pictures of her dog.)
